Being pregnant is fairly anti-climatic. You can't tell anyone (or at least I feel like I shouldn't...just in case) so it feels fairly unexciting and SLOW. You can't decide if you should eat more and exercise less (in my case, as a fairly intense athlete its been a tough decision with little literature to support it). And in my case, its even slightly dangerous. Today I had to try not to strangle a new graduate student who was pipetting Trisol pretty much on top of my desk and then my PI walked in and asked me to prep some formaldehyde-fixed tissue for the next day. Both chemicals that are quite dangerous especially for pregnant mothers!!! And then to top it off, there's been some hemming and hawing about my pending graduation date (end of March). Looks like I might be giving birth while giving my defense if somebody doesn't decide to hurry things up (and for all the 14+ hrs/day 6 days a week, it is not me!!!)! Though let me tell you those 14+ hr days have definitely taken a hit. Half the time I feel like I can hardly make it through an entire day, much less a 14 hr day. I've started to make serious efforts to limit myself to 12hr days. That seems fair and reasonable and healthy! The nice thing is, no morning sickness which is a blessing I'll be forever grateful for. I still have 2 weeks to go until my first pre-natal appointment. Despite the fact they think I'm about 9 weeks right now, they just didn't have any free appointments. It might be my first baby but apparently loads of people are pro-creating as well! I honestly think I might only be about 7 weeks but I just want to have that first confirmation that at least the initial growth is good and its a viable pregnancy. Right now every twinge sends me into a panic...it took us so long to get pregnant (>1yr of pretty robust trying!) that I am paranoid that I won't take it to term. I only have to get through 3-5weeks til I pass the first hurdle but that sure feels like forever especially when I'm sitting in a lab next to chemicals all day. And in other new, this will make me due sometime in August which is pretty much the worst time possible for either a) starting medical school or b) job hunting.
Edit (4 days later): so that whole no morning sickness thing??? Well, I'm probably still luckier than most but for the last week I've spent the morning pep talking myself and my stomach into work. Part of me is secretly glad that I have these symptoms but the other obviously feels sick and awful and tired and crappy. My thighs are getting big, my butt is getting big, and thank goodness my boobs are too! One small mercy at least ;)
Edit (another 4 days later): and now I feel great (well mostly) so I'm back to freaking out that something isn't right. Tomorrow is finally my first appointment and it will either be terrifically wonderful or horribly sad depending on whether the pregnancy is viable and doing well. I am terrified I won't here a heartbeat or that they'll tell me I'm anything earlier than 8 weeks (which would mean lack of development) because for sure I should be at least 9-11+ at this point. Lord, there is no making me happy!
And on top of it, I have lost my wallet (AGAIN!), the grocery store won't take a check with a passport and I have no idea if my doctor's office will take a passport on check-in. Should be an exciting day! :P
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