The M1 Summer Baby That Wasn't....

I know, I know...our lives are CRAZY!  But at the same time, the best thing in our lives is absolutely DLO and since I'm no spring chicken we decided that we'd aim for that narrow target of the summer between M1 and M2 for baby #2.  We had lots of fun trying, if a little sporadic thanks to the stress of medical school but as another single-lined pregnancy test stares me in the face, I realize our summer baby is likely not to be.  And I'm sad.  It takes a lot of gumption to make that commitment for another kid (especially during med school) and once you make it, you can't wait!  Or at least that's how I am.  I have that first initial panic attack, like "wait, are we sure we want to do this?!?!?!" and then I fall in love with the baby that I envision we're making.  But we had a very finite window since as you might previously recall I commute! to medical school and definitely can't have a baby when I'm on the road.  So we're back to not trying and I have one more week where its possible I could still test positive but my hopes are sinking and I'm having to come to peace with envisioning an entirely different M1 summer...one full of sleep, no diapers, and one-on-one time with DLO.  I think I could fall in love with that too but...well, guess I just hold out hope for another week at least. :)